HOW TO DEAL WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE

When you find yourself in a situation where you’re hurt because of something someone did or said to you, perhaps you’re after a fight, you might find comfort in the following verses, like they comforted me:

“Turn away from evil and do good.

Search for peace, and work to maintain it.

The eyes of the Lord watch over those who do right;

His ears are open to their cries for help.” – Psalms 34:14-15, NLT

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted;

He rescues those whose spirits are crushed.” – Psalms 34:18, NLT

“…but the Lord comes to the rescue each time.” – Psalms 34:19, NLT

“…NO ONE who takes refuge in Him will be condemned.” – Psalms 34:22, NLT

I know it can be hard to be kind when someone is hurting you (especially when it’s someone you love), but instead of judging them, maybe we should pray for them instead. Not to excuse their behavior,  but if they act up, maybe they’re going through something and are hurt, too. Maybe we aren’t innocent in this situation either. Let’s try to be compassionate. Sometimes it’s really not about us. We all know that we had worse moments, too, and many times did or said something that we deeply regretted, still JESUS FORGAVE US. We should have the same attitude. But how? Well, from my own experience, We tend to be blind to our faults sometimes, so it’s good to pray for God to open our eyes to them as well.

There was this person (very close to me) that I had a huge fight with and didn’t talk to for years. This weighed very heavily on me. Honestly, this is what unforgiveness does: it doesn’t just hurt the other person, it poisons you, too. After some time had passed, I felt the Lord wanted me to forgive this person. It took me a while, but after some prayer, I finally called that person and apologized for anything I had done that might have hurt her. Now, did I feel like it? No. Did I feel like I was the only guilty one? No, (to be completely honest, I was blaming this person in my head for most of the hurt). I simply made a choice to forgive. Did I receive an apology in return? No… BUT, I felt like a huge weight fell off my shoulders (literally!). Suddenly, I felt such peace (again, AFTER the CHOICE to forgive, NOT before). Although that person did not return the apology, I could tell that she felt it; she simply didn’t have the courage to say it out loud. Should this stop us from forgiving? I don’t think so, because everything changed after that. I got someone close to me back. Does it mean we always need to invite people back into our lives when we forgive them? No, sometimes we shouldn’t. But when you choose to forgive, you will receive healing.

Another thing we should keep in mind is that we are supposed to show love and kindness and be the Light to this world. Be patient, because it is one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit. [“But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” – Galatians 5:22-23, NLT] There are already too many religious Christians full of judgment. They don’t bring people closer to God; they push them away. Be transformed instead, and people will notice Jesus thanks to this.

Reflect Christ in ALL situations and watch your mouth… [“The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” – Proverbs 18:21, NIV];

Try to avoid unnecessary conflict [“Turn away from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it.” – Psalm 34:14, NIV];

Don’t be harsh [“Be beautiful inside, in your hearts, with the lasting charm of a gentle and quiet spirit that is so precious to God.” – 1 Peter 3:4, NLT and “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” – Proverbs 15:1, NIV];

Love [“If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.” – 1 Corinthians 13:2, NIV];

Remember [“So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace.” – Romans 8:6, NLT].

If you get angry, walk away and pray. Rebuke the anger and get into His presence. Don’t return until you’ve calmed down. It is not wise to “continue the fight” when being emotional, as it usually leads to more hurt for both sides. Again, be patient. It takes time to work things out. If you can’t get through to someone, instead of fighting, take it to God and let Him work this out. Trust that He will. “Be still and know that He is God.” [Psalm 46:10]

DISCLAIMER: The information provided on this website, including advice and insights, is based on my personal experiences and Christian beliefs. I am not a licensed medical doctor. For any health concerns, please consult with a qualified healthcare professional. Read the full disclaimer here.